The wisdom of Proverbs 13:20 says, “He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed.”
When we consider and evaluate the major influences in our life that have helped to shape the kind of person we are, we must admit that peer pressure, people influence has to rank high on the list. The people we choose to allow into our lives will have a powerful influence either positively or negatively.
Now we are not talking about the casual or occasional contact or encounter we may have with others. But those relationships that we choose to let influence us on a more intimate and personal basis are very important. Even those associations of a business and professional nature, will influence our lives significantly. We should never underestimate the power of influence.
The influence of those around us is so powerful, until many times we don’t realize how much we are being affected because influences generally develop over a period of time!
We often associate peer pressure with teenagers, however it is a powerful force in the lives of everyone including adults…because it is so subtle. If you are around people who talk negative, chances are that you will talk negative. If you are around people who spend all the money they make, chances are that you also will spend all the money you make. If you are around people who go to night clubs more than they go to church, chances are that you will do the same thing. If you are around people who do not read, chances are that you won't read.
People can in subtle ways keep nudging us off our desired course of life, a little at a time until, finally, one day we ask ourselves, "How did I get here?" We must take time periodically to examine; study and evaluate the influences we allow in our lives, if we really want our lives to turn out the way we've planned.
Consider the following questions which may help you to evaluate your current influencers or associations:
1. “Who am I around?”
Make a mental note of the people with whom you most often associate. This is important because you have to evaluate everybody who is able to influence you in any way.
2. “What are these influencers doing to me?”
This is a critical question to ask. What have they got me doing? What have they got me listening to? What have they got me reading? Where have they got me going? What do they have me thinking? How have they got me talking? How have they got me feeling? What have they got me saying?
You've got to make a serious evaluation of how others are influencing you, both negatively and positively.
3. “Is this in line with my life’s purpose?”
“Is that okay?” Maybe everyone you associate with has been a positive, energizing contributing influence. Then again, maybe there are some who have been a drain; some who have been takers; some who have been manipulators; some who have been negative influences.
The point is that you take a close and objective look. Everything is worth a second look, especially the power of influence. Both will take you somewhere, but only one will take you in the direction you need to go.
It's easy to just dismiss the things that influence our lives. One man says, "I live here, but I don't think it matters. I'm around these people, but I don't think it hurts." Well I would suggest that you take another look at that...because everything matters!
Yes, some things matter more than others, however everything amounts to something and you and I are being influenced one way or another. It is vital that we are continuously evaluating and examining to find out whether our associations are tipping the scales toward the positive or toward the negative. When it comes to who and what is influencing our lives, ignorance is not the best policy. Finding out is the best policy.
Jim Rohm tells the story of the little bird, who had his wing over his eye and he was crying.
The owl said to the bird, "You are crying."
"Yes," said the little bird, and he pulled his wing away from his eye.
"Oh, I see," said the owl. "You're crying because the big bird pecked out your eye."
And the little bird said, "No, I'm not crying because the big bird pecked out my eye. I'm crying because I let him."
It's easy for us to simply let influences shape our lives, to let associations determine our direction, to let pressures overwhelm us, and to let the wind and the tides take us where they are going.
The bigger questions are: Are we letting ourselves become what we wish to become? Are we influencing others toward a higher place or are we being influenced to remain in place?
